HI GUYS
I was going to make a journal to update about my birthday, like.. take pictures of all the stuff I got and whatnot, but I a. didn't get a lot, so it'd be a short journal, b. am waiting for the last gift, and c. DONT HAVE TIME.
seriously, the only time for drawing I've had has been friggin doodles during class. <_<

uhh, yeah, marching band and new and improved sophomore classes have eaten my time away... quitting marching next year. I promise.

life updates? almost finished my pkman trainer costume, got a piercing in my right ear (that's 2 in my left and 3 in my right.. I want at most 5 in each ear.. @w@)

K
ONTO THE MEME

52 Secrets About Yourself (Not secrets anymore)
Be HONEST no matter what.

1. What is your natural hair color?
medium brown. never dyed my whole head.

2. Where was your ID pic taken?
my carpet. XD

3. What's your middle name?
I have two. and only the best of my friends know what they are. kekeke

4. Your current relationship status?
contently single.

5. Honestly, does your crush like you back?
n/a

6. Honestly, what is your current mood?
panicked, stressed, tired, calm, happy, sad, excited, nervous, and scared.
whew! you can ask for explanations if you really want.

7. What's the color of your underwear?
white; beige bra though.

8. What is one thing that makes you happy?
my friends.
they always cheer me up or make me laugh or send me videos of kittens riding on automatic vacuums and falling off or help console me with my problems. <3

9.Who was the last person you cuddled with?
prolly sohma or nyx.. do hugs count?
I often rest my head on (or HEADBUTT MYSELF INTO) soh's shoulder at lunch, or something.

10. If you could go back in time, and change something what would it be?
absolutely nothing. if I changed one thing that bothered me, another thing would bother me. if I changed where I lived, my ideals and personality and friendships would change along with it.

11. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day-
a friggin kitten.
>w<
or.. a fish.

12. Ever had a near death experience?
I swear I almost drowned once..
almost got hit by a car once...
uh.. ran into a sliding glass door once? XD;

13. Something you do a lot?
text. lol.

14. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
One-X by Three Days Grace
It's surprising that there's actually a song stuck in my head right now.. @_@

15. Who did you copy and paste this from?

I still need to read yours nyx D: I APOLOGIZE.

16. Name someone with the same b-day as you?

WOO I can actually list someone here <: I am superior.

17. When was the last time you cried?
uh.. last night.. ish.

18. Have you ever sang in front of a large audience?
YES actually. 4th or 5th grade I had a solo in choir and I tried very hard~
other than that, recently? uh.. I've sung for kanny and nyx live via voice chat.. I sang for tracy as well, in like.. 6th grade I swear.

19. If you could have one super power what would it be?
gyrokenesis.

20. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
hair, then face. or the other way around. then I check out the bod.. <w<

22. What’s your biggest secret?
uuuhh..

23. What's your favorite color?
hot pink, lime green.

24. When was the last time you lied?
just recently?

25. Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
<3 disney

27. What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
nothing! nothing at ALL.

28. What's your favorite smell?
fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies(or any sweet cake, cookie, or pie...), snow, rain.

29. If you could describe life in one word what would it be?
potential?
fulfilling?
I'm not really sure, but I know it can be what you want it to be if you TRY.

30. When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
today. XD

31. Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
mist.

32. What are you thinking about right now?
my bed... I should be in it. @_@

33. What should you be doing?
putting away laundry or reading a book for english class.

34. What was the last thing that made you upset?
my brother and his smoking habits, or my impoverished status.

35. Do you like working in the yard?
no.

36. If you could have any last name in the world, what would you want?
I don't really care. XD I think it's funny that my name is so common, actually.

37. Name 5 things in your closet:
clothes, canvases, a crappy snowcone maker, shoes, and hangers.

38. Do you act different around your crush?
n/a~

39. When was the last time you slept with a stuffed animal?
errynight. my bed is CROWDED with pillows/stuffies.

40. How many times do you take a shower a week?
every day.

41. Do you brush your teeth everyday?
yep!

42. Have you ever said something stupid infront of your crush?
n/a!
though, with past crushes?.. yeah, back before I knew how to talk to them.. <_<

43. Have you ever watched a hockey game?
... no XD

44. Do you lie about your age?
nope! though, when I was 12, people seriously thought I was 18+... highest age I got was 20..
that was through RO, though. XD

45. Ever been jealous about something stupid?
god, yes. >:

46. Do you pick your nose?
no XD dropped that habit in elementary school YO DAWG

47. What's the one food you hate?
I hate many foods. but, predominantly... boiled asparagus. @__@

48. What's the one junk food you cant live without?
err.. I can live without them, but I like them.. probably ice cream or something like that.

49. How old were you when you found out Santa was fake?
Mom disguised her handwriting better when she was trying to be the tooth fairy.
I've always known.

50. Have you ever blown your nose and looked inside it the napkin?
LOL no, what, do you think I'll find gold in there or something? it's not a treasure hunt..

51. Describe your favourite underwear you have?
uh.. they're all white. and all the same. and I have the same bra in white variety.
so. EACH AND EVERY PAIR.

52. Did you lie in any of these questions?
nope..

Hey guys. I was going to post a big long rant about this but tracy() and I just had a chat about the same thing, and I guess it's a controversial topic.

my side: Please. please please please. Tell me why you like or don't like something of mine. Or of anyone's. it's really not that hard.. when I critique I simply bring up Notepad (or textedit for you mac users) and just start writing why I like or dislike a piece..

tracy's side: people are lazy. I shouldn't let it get to me, nor should I expect too much of people because honestly, it's a sign of encouragement if people simply say that they like a piece and don't tell me why. Not everyone's going to try and make me improve by giving me long drawn-out critiques.

BUT SERIOUSLY.
*agrees with my side more*
NOBODY. EVER. COMMENTS. ANYMORE. It's soo frustrating when I get a fave.. it's like.. great.. you appreciate this piece of art.. but why? HOW CAN I MAKE SURE YOU APPRECIATE MORE PIECES OF ART FROM ME >:l

It's like.. picture sitting somewhere, happily sketching away.. and someone walks by.
scenario one: "Oh, that looks cool."
scenario two: "Oh, that looks cool. I love the way you drew her arms~ and this part looks nice too, it looks great overall."

if you can't tell, number one is a FAVOURITE situation. number two is a COMMENT situation. even a small comment like that would make me happier than someone just faving my art and calling it good. I hate being the bitchy artist who complains about faving and running. I really do. I DO appreciate that you like my art enough to add it into your collection of art that you appreciate...
but really guys.. is it really that hard to comment?

Next time you see a piece of art that you like, pull up Notepad or TextEdit to the side, and write just what you like about a piece. I'm serious, artists LOVE it. Write what you DON'T like about a piece too, because if other people are like me, they would prefer that you tell them exactly what you don't like about a piece so they can improve, rather than a favorite.

----------------

UPDATE!

As always, I haven't posted because I have a massive list of things to draw. I'm currently working on dear Sohma()'s commission, as well as an animated group icon(which will look friggin' sweet once I'm finished.. still sketching though), as well as a meme which I'm working very hard on.

I basically switch off depending on which one I'm tired of working on, or whatever. I have a list of things I need to start or finish drawing, on a notecard, taped to my monitor. It's 10 drawings long. ;_; Some are just ideas of things that I should eventually get to, and some are drawings which are YEARS old... D:

How's everyone doing? :3

hello everyone!

just a little update. I HAVE been drawing. In fact, I have my first commission!

my dear friend decided SHE wanted to order my FIRST commission. So, although they haven't officially started, I have prices in mind and I've been working on something for her~

And, since my dad is in the navy, last time I went to Hawaii I went to get a new military ID. So! What this means is, I can finally start a bank account and a debit card. If you're not sixteen, you need official ID(school IDs don't count..) to start a bank account or debit card... So, I got it!

That means I can start paypal and stuff soon.

That means I can start commissions.
yaaay!



Other than that.
A good friend's birthday is coming up.
Maff is excited.

And...
marching band is coming up soon! My friends are a little disappointed as this means less maff time, and yes, I am too, but I'm so excited for band to start c: I've missed marching! And this year, we won't have to march around in 103 degree weather in the hottest week of summer. DX

SCHOOL'S STARTING SOON TOO. I'm so excited about that. Last year I had a really lame english teacher, and science class was kind of boring, but this year i'm really excited because for the first time in two years I have classes with friends! I hope.

I think that's it for my life. A little scattered.. I'm kind of sdfasdg right now... but yeah. How are you guys? c:

I have just been informed by dear that my prices that you don't know about were set too high.

And now I'm beginning to doubt my artistic ability.

Basically, I've run into a problem. I'm researching commissions on dA and (the prices are so cheap! but will I get more commissions that way?) the problem is, I don't just want to draw characters. That's so boring!

Character after character...


I'd love to go crazy with my art, and actually make it into ART. Yknow? Not just display artistic abilities with how well I can draw a character. I'd like to be able to add some creativity into my commissions, and maybe add a theme/concept.

Would people buy my commissions, and give me freedom to do what I want with it?
Also, would they consider it if they knew how long I'd take to finish them? Especially with school and all.


*really discouraged atm*

tagged me, baby.

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Maffin
2. Maffy
3. Maff

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU'VE HAD:
1. Dark
2. Crystal Clear
3. Maffin
I can only think of one person who could remember the first two, and she probably only remembers the second.

THREE THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 33 MINUTES:
1. Played Sonic 3D LOL 8D
2. Listened to its amazing soundtrack
3. Talked with tracy c:

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My optimism. C:
2. My eyes. O_O
3. My talents. ouo

THREE THINGS YOU DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. MY NOSE. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE CROOKED.
2. My emotional OCD habits. (I don't have to fix crooked things. Well, I do. But there are different forms of OCD, people. c: ) SUCH AS: overly guilty at stupid things, emotionally attatched to objects, worry too much, too harsh on self, etc. I BROKE A STICK. AND I FELT GUILTY.
3. My shyness. :0 Sometimes I can be so I-don't-care-what-people-think, and wear like.. I dunno, a friggin tutu to school, and be sooo outgoing, but other times I just hide in a ball and don't say anything ..

THREE PARTS OF YOUR ORIGINS:
1. English
2. Irish
3. Welsh

THREE THINGS YOU'RE AFRAID OF:
1. Something bad happening to the people I love. ;_;
2. THINGS INSIDE OF ME THAT I DON'T WANT TO BE INSIDE OF ME. I'm talkin like friggin tapeworms.. and.. things crawling under my skin--DCKSJFSX _{I swear I'll hunt you down if you turn this into a sexual innuendo of some sort.}
3. Death, like everyone else..

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. Mmm, a purple tanktop.
2. Grey skinnies~
3. My favorite white shoes. <3

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Laughter.
2. Sustenance.
3. Music/internet.

THREE IMPORTANT OBJECTS:
1. Computer
2. Like, anything I've grown emotionally attatched to.(stuffed animals, PILLOWS EVEN)
3. Gifts.

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS:
1. IDON'THAVEFAVORITEBANDSILOVESOMANYT_T
2. sdfsdfdsfsd
3. don't make me choose.

THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY:
1. Scold self and tell self to be happy. Forcing a smile.
2. Analyze what's wrong, solve the problem.
3. talking to my friends. I love you guuuys ;u;

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
1. DONTMAKEMECHOOSET_T
2. IHAVELIKEOVER20
3. NUUUU


THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
1. Commissions.
2. Dye a gradient into my hair. C:
3. Approaching others. Whoawhoawhoa, SOCIAL COMMUNICATION?!

THREE THINGS YOU REGRET:
1. Not standing up for myself when I ever had the chance.
2. You know, as I think about this, if I hadn't done the regretful things of my past, I wouldn't be the same person as I am today.
3. So, know what? I don't regret anything. Nevermind. c:

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. ACTUAL LOVE.
2. Honesty, and being able to talk to one another.
3. similar wants/traits plz.

THREE IMPORTANT THINGS YOU'VE GIVEN TO THE WORLD:
1. My art and music and anything else that easily expresses yourself.
2. My input/advise (my friends tell me I'm really good with advise.. so... lolol)
3. My ... personality. Think about it.

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I think I'm a good artist.
2. But I am NOT overly conceited. I KNOW I have a looong way to go and I'm far far far faaaaar from perfect. @_@
3. I ... AM A MAN.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
1. good hair ... (I"m so into fashion .. bad hair will frame your face badly, and thus make you look unattractive.. I don't know what it is about the super long flippy zac efron hair, but it DOESN'T look good. XD)
2. Pretty eyes. *o* they're the most attractive part on someone else I think~
3. Nice smile/laugh, and preferably taller... @u@

THREE EMOTIONAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
1. Kind. Gosh, there's something about it when a guy shows compassion... >u< NO THE BAD BOY DICKHEADS ARE NOT FOR ME.
2. Good morals. I'd like to settle on decent arrangements plz.
3. Good sense of humor, but not TOO funny. Picture it: *calls him on the phone crying* "I-I had a bad dream!" "BAHAHA YOU WIMP HAHAHAH *hangs up*" ...;_; Yeah, so, serious enough to be able to talk to~ <3

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. Purposefully hurt others. I can't.
2. Extreme stunts-- jumping off a cliff into a river, ROLLER COASTERS even, other scary things..
3. Other.... things... ...

THREE THINGS YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST:
1. The innocence. I drew something and thought it was the best thing ever. And flashing back, to that foggy, hazy memory, I clearly remember sitting, listening to the same Linkin Park track over and over, and drawing the best freaking thing ever. I remember it being the best.
2. The innocence. Social awkwardness and shyness did not exist.
3. The innocence. I think this pretty much sums it up.
Honestly though, I absolutely love my life now and while it's fun to reminisce, I don't want to run back there. It would spoil the memory.

THREE GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE:
1. I'm kind of fine right now, actually.
2. Though, I AM saving for a new tablet.
3. Ooh, I know. People to buy my commissions(once I set them up)

THREE REASONS WHY YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE:
1. Everything. If you think about it, certain things happening in my life really taught me lessons or made me a different person, and if those split seconds never existed, I might be completely different, or just slightly. I mean.. Had I not picked up Katy Coope's how-to-draw manga book, I would probably never have been as artistic as I am now. And I mean, not just "I can draw", there's an attitude that goes with it. I think there's a certain artistic vision, as well as a state of mind, and an opemindedness that goes along with it, along with certain other things.
2. My family status. Had I not been born into the family with the certain situations I live with now(single mother, low money, etc etc), I would NEVER be as thankful as I am today. I hate it when people think you need money to be happy, because I'm the happiest I have ever been in my whole life and I think this is the worst our money has been in my life, as well. XD Not to complain at all! It's taught me how to appreciate what I have, and I have responsibility as well as actually thinking about what I want/need before striving for it... yeah.
3. My friends! God, what would I do without you? Each and every one of you. SOME part of your personality has rubbed off on me, I know it. You all affect my decisions and my obligations, and EVERYTHING.


THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
1. Drawing, painting, etc.
2. Singing..~
3. Anything hair related. I cut my own hair, dye it, research it, just flip through hair magazines.. XD

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Eat something. O___O
2. Mmm, sprite edit or something..
3. TALK WITH KANNY RRR WHY HAVEN'T YOU BEEN ON TODAY D:<

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. Commissioner/painter c:
2. Hairstylist!
3. Something music-related. (be in an orchestra/wind ensemble? conduct bands? compose musicLOLPROBABLYNOTD: )

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR HOLIDAY:
1. Mi-chi-gaaaan!
2. Colorado/california(WHEREVERTHEHELLYOUAREATTHETIMELAINA)
3. Canadaaaa!

SOMEDAY. SOMEDAY I'LL MEET YOU GUYS.

FIRST THREE CARTOON CHARACTERS YOU THINK OF:
1. this says
2. nothing.
3. about my personality.

THREE BOY’S NAMES:
1.
2.
3.

THREE GIRL'S NAMES:
1.
2.
3.

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Find the PERFECT place. The place I always dream of. I have a little place in my head that I think of when I'm bored, or when I get tired of the town I live in.
2. Meet three friends online that I've always wanted to meet irl. ;_; you three know who you are.
3. love life in general.

THREE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ OR DIE PAINFULLY:

1.
2.
3.